Frequently Asked Questions

I thought I would try to answer some of the most asked questions that I get as a foster parent.  I don't mind the questions.  I enjoy educating people on the process and the why of things.  I asked many questions myself before getting here.  :)  Here we go in no particular order....

How long will you have them?
I don't know.  I will never know the answer to that one, unless they are becoming my forever child.  Since the whole point of foster care is reunification, they will be with me until the family has done all that is required of them.  I could have them as little as a month or as long as 18 months.

Why are they in foster care?
I can't really answer that question.  My children's past is private.  There are a plethora of reasons for a child to be removed from their home. My kids are with me for one of those reasons.

What do they call you? or Why do they call you Mommy?
They call me Mom.  Most children in the foster system will call their foster parents mom and dad.  Occasionally, they might call them by their first names but that isn't the norm.  Calling us mom and dad encourages a family feel.  These children need to know that they are a part of a family and the adults in charge are their "for now" parents.  It is also the easiest thing for little tykes to say.  It also creates a united front.  It doesn't separate the bio children from the foster children.  No one is different from the other.  No one is different or sticks out because they are calling you "Ms So and So" and the others are saying mom. They are all family.  Honestly, my children (and I have little ones) have no problems distinguishing between their bio mom and me.  We have conversations daily about their bio family. There is no confusion for them.

Won't it be hard on you when they leave?
YES!  I will cry my eyes out.  I will become a hermit for a few days.  I will eat ice cream.  I will cry.  I will mourn the loss of them.  However, it isn't about me.  It is about them and doing what is best for them.  So if going back to their bio family is the best, then great.  I will give myself time to heal and figure out where to go from there.

So since you are a foster parent and your single, do you even want to get married?  (You would be surprised how many time I have been asked this.)
Yes!  :)  In fact, I'm open to set ups.  ;)

I hope this helps answer some of your questions.  If you have more feel free to ask.