Bonding

I've always been good with children.  I started babysitting at 13.  I worked in the church nursery as a teenager.  All the kids I took care of loved me.  It wasn't hard to love them, and they all loved having me be their babysitter.  I didn't think getting children to bond with me would be difficult.

Enter foster children.

Bonding is now work.  It takes effort.  Letting them know they are loved and safe is a daily task.  Due to their situations and circumstances, they don't naturally trust right away.  I get that.  I've been hurt in life too.  Trusting isn't easy at all for me.  I don't have a plethora of friends because I too have issues allowing people into my life.  I get it.

Knowing this causes me to work harder to show them love and safety.  Hugs and kisses are given freely.  Books are read while they are sitting on my lap, not beside me.  Every once in a while, something happens and you know they are beginning to receive that love.  I had such an event just recently.

I arrived at daycare to pick up my little ones.  My 16 month old baby saw me at the door. She RAN across the room smiling and laughing.  She practically fell into the baby gate trying to get to me.  I picked her up and   she laughed her precious laugh.  It made me so happy!  She was showing me in her own little way that she was happy to see me, that she knew love.  I almost cried tears of joy.

When my 2 1/2 year old asks to stay home from daycare not because she is sick but because she wants to be with me, I know she is learning that I love her.  We have conversations almost daily about how much I love her and how smart/precious/beautiful she is.  I can tell those words are sinking into her soul.  She sings songs about Jesus' love because I tell her constantly that He loves her.  She is learning the truth of His love as well.

I want them to feel wanted... to borrow a line from a song.  I think they are slowly getting the fact that they are wanted and loved.  It makes my heart melt.